Top Ten Relational Needs …
1. Acceptance – receiving others willingly and unconditionally (even when their behavior is imperfect) and loving them in spite of any differences that may exist between you.
2. Affection – expressing care and closeness through physical touch and through words such as, “I love you,” or “I care about you.”
3. Appreciation – expressing thanks, praise, or commendation, particularly in recognition of someone’s accomplishments or efforts.
4. Approval (Blessing) – building up or affirming another person, particularly for who they are (as opposed to what they do); affirming both the fact and the importance of our relationship with another person.
5. Attention – conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care, taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds.
6. Comfort – responding with care to a hurting person through words, actions, emotional responses, and physical touch; hurting with and for others in the midst of their grief or pain.
7. Encouragement – urging others to persist and persevere in their efforts to attain their goals; stimulating others toward love and good deeds.
8. Respect – valuing one another highly, treating one another as important, and honoring one another with our words and actions.
9. Security – establishing and maintaining harmony in our relationships and providing freedom from fear or threat of harm through expressions of vulnerability, deepening of trust, and the successful resolution of conflict.
10. Support – coming along side others and providing gentle, appropriate assistance with a problem or struggle.
These come from the research and reflection of Doctor David Ferguson of Intimate life Ministries, Austin TX.
He has written an abundance of books on these topics and heads a non-profit relationship ministry.